Monday, September 25, 2006

Call to prayer

Please pray for my car! Today I need help from my fellow Christians!

Ultra-leftist sabs (when I find out who you are liberals you will have a short and painful meeting with the end of a bullet!) have destroyed my car!

Working in night time and in silence they have contrived to alter the perfect American engineering of my engine, cracking open the gear box and causing the gear oil to spill in great rivers upon the ground.

Normally I would be confident that fine American engineering can fix it, but I fear perhaps these terrorists have gone too far! The mechanic did look gravely upon it, sore vexed and shake his head. I fear it will cost too much for it to be worth fixing and must be dumped in the sea.


Please mention my motor in your prayers this evening.

"Dear God,

Your servant Sam Johnston needs his gears fixed. Please see to it that in the morning when he returns to see your fine American engineer it starts straight away, the transmission is as smooth as an ice sundae and the bill is kept low so he can keep on investing his money into the world's greatest economy, thus helping our troops do Your work in Iraq.

Thank you LORD.


P.S. Please kill Michael Moore too."

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Rosie O Donnell

We MUST take action in a loving Christian way and create an example of this evil woman.

Click here for analysis and details of the action plan.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

I'm truly sorry.

I hope you can forgive me. I hope the Lord Jesus can forgive me. I have not posted for too long. This is mainly because I had to travel out of state to kick the ass of a relative of mine who was turning into a Liberal. Luckily I was able to bring her back to God. Even though I had to do it by her ear!

Here are my latest thoughts about the dangers of Atheism on Jesus' favorite website, The truth about Atheism Exposed. Part II.